SCENE, SITTING ROOM IN A COUNTRY COTTAGE. OLIVE AND LENA ARE FINISHING BREAKFAST. OLIVE IS DRESSED, LENA IN A DRESSING GOWN.

VOICE OFF “Oh, 0oh it’s only me”

OLIVE Come in Dolores. (ENTER DOLORES CARRYING A LETTER AND A BUCKET WITH A SHOVEL IN IT.)

DOLORES Ron the postman asked me to bring this letter along to you, he has to go back to the Post Office. He’s hurt his foot..

LENA Is he badly hurt?

DOLORES No, I don’t think so, but it made it difficult driving I was up early and saw Ron stop down the lane. I thought the letter looked urgent, (TURNS THE ENVELOPE TRYING TO LOOK IN THE “WINDOW”) I couldn’t quite see, but it looks as if it might be from the bank.

OLIVE (TAKING THE LETTER FROM HER HAND, SPEAKS SHARPLY) Thank you Dolores.

LENA Why have you brought that bucket in Dolores?

DOLORES I nearly forgot. I thought you could use some of my orgasmic manure on your peas and beans. They don’t look too healthy do they? I’ve got some to spare, the ostriches are doing well at the moment.

LENA (FAINTLY) Oh dear! I can’t face that so soon after breakfast.

DOLORES It’s all good clean stuff. Look! (HOLDS A SHOVEL OF PELLETS UP AND LETS THEM TRICKLE BACK INTO THE BUCKET). It’s a jolly good side line, I reckon the name attracts people. Yes Zoo Poo is a pretty catchy name don’t you think?

OLIVE I suppose so, if that’s the way your mind works. Could you take it outside as you go please Dolores?

DOLORES O.K. I expect you want to open your letter. Anyway it’s my day for making bread so I must get on. You ought to have a go at bread making Mrs. J. it gets rid of all your frusterations. And you know what I always say don’t you?

OLIVE Of course we do. (OLIVE AND LENA TOGETHER) Making bread do clean your ‘ands lovely.

DOLORES See for yourself. (HOLDS OUT HER HANDS, OLIVE LOOKS AND TURNS AWAY, LENA LOOKS ANT) SHUDDERS. DOLORES LAUGHS) Just my little joke Mrs.J.

LENA Yes, of course. Please excuse me, I must go and have my shower. (EXITS)